Dear Betty:
A girl I’ve been dating for over a month went from chatting/texting with me a couple times a week to completely ghosting me. I thought things were going well, but she hasn’t called or texted me in about two weeks, then out of nowhere she asks if I want to meet up for a movie as if nothing happened. I get that we all have lives and things come up, but how do I know if I should let her back in or not?
Unfortunately, ghosting is a common occurrence in current dating times for many people. What this behavior exemplifies is a person’s lack of regard for how it affects the other person involved. Ghosting can trigger a multitude of feelings and questions, like empathy and wanting to give the other person the benefit of the doubt – e.g., a family emergency to feeling inadequate, like “Did I do something wrong? Am I not good enough?”
Consider the ghoster’s actions, or in this case non-action, as her giving insight into who she really is. Letting a ghoster, or anyone else who leaves you feeling mistreated, back into your life is teaching them how to treat you in the future. I suggest not taking the bait with a polite “Thanks, but no thanks!” attitude.
If you want to know more about dating, and finding someone who will regard you with the consideration and respect you deserve, contact me for a complimentary session. I would love to help out!
Wishing you love,
Betty Russell, BCC
Board Certified Dating & Relationship Coach
615-283-3393
betty@relationshipelements.com
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