Dear Betty,
Why do I always get jealous and end up driving my partners away?
There are many reasons why jealousy gets triggered. To name a few; childhood trauma, history of betrayal, fear of abandonment, unhealthy co-dependency, anxious attachment style and more.
To discover what is going on and to create a new pattern let’s start with this exercise:
- First, check in with yourself. Ask “What am I feeling?” and label it. E.g. sad, mad, scare, frustrated. We know that feelings are neither right or wrong, they just are.
- Ask yourself “What thoughts, beliefs and past experiences have I attached to this feeling?”
- Is what I am feeling true of what’s happening now or is this feeling from a past experience?
- How can I use these insights to help me grow and create new patterns that are in my highest good?
Remember, you are the chooser and as such you choose which emotions to follow. Are you going to follow the emotion of jealousy or something else?
I would love to know your insights and help you create new patterns.
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