My client Tom had a sad story to tell me when we first met. He had been in a relationship with—he was firm on this point—the love of his life, when suddenly he was tossed aside. His devastation was complete and the trauma tapped into his primal abandonment wound. As we talked, over the next [read more]
Interdependence vs. Codependence—It’s Okay to Have Needs
Kimia had been in several relationships that started out well, but eventually did not fulfill her. She invariably ended up feeling taken advantage of, and that her boyfriends did not really care deeply for her. I asked her, “Do you think you made it clear to them that you won’t tolerate disrespectful behavior and that [read more]
6 Great Reasons to Date An Outdoor Enthusiast
My friend Jill is a city girl through and through, born and raised in Chicago. But when she was a graduate student at Carnegie Mellon she fell in love with a nature buff who spent lots of time hiking, canoeing, cross country skiing. When they first met, Don lived in the boonies an hour from [read more]
Being Single—Own It/Love It
Single? You are most definitely not alone. Singletons now outnumber married people in all age brackets. Admittedly, the stats don’t take into account unmarried partnerships, but the fact remains—people no longer live in panic or feel like failures if they are thirty and unmarried. Or forty. Or fifty. Or sixty. Etc. You get the idea. [read more]
Being in the Flow Part I
In Siddhartha, his novel about the Buddha, Herman Hesse wrote, “The river is everywhere.” It makes sense that it was beside a river that the Buddha achieved enlightenment. If the river is the flow of life, all the things we clutter up the banks of the river with serve only to keep us from that [read more]
So, Why Are You Still Single?
A loaded question with a number of equally loaded answers. First of all, are you single and loving it, or single and searching? To help navigate the endless nosy versions of the question, “So, why are you still single?” you need to decide into which camp you fall. But more about that later. Congratulations, first [read more]