Kimia had been in several relationships that started out well, but eventually did not fulfill her. She invariably ended up feeling taken advantage of, and that her boyfriends did not really care deeply for her. I asked her, “Do you think you made it clear to them that you won’t tolerate disrespectful behavior and that [read more]
Live together or Marry? 21st Century Options
A mere 50 years ago (which isn’t that long, really) everything was very different. There was still a huge stigma on couples who chose to live together “out of wedlock” as it was called, and parents whose children did so white-knuckled the social embarrassment until they could finally send out those wedding announcements. Aside from [read more]
The Chemistry of Love – Love and the Brain
If I were to describe a situation in which someone experienced a flood of dopamine and ocytocin, a drop in serotonin, and spikes in adrenaline and norepinephrine, all those brain chemicals going crazy might make you assume this person was overdosing on some kind of highly addictive drug. You’d be right. The “drug” is called [read more]
Dating before Engagement: How Long?
You are probably familiar with the show, The Bachelor. One of the most persistent questions that arises among fans and critics of the show is: “Is 12 weeks long enough to know someone before asking for her hand in marriage?” 12 weeks, also known as 3 months, AKA 90 days. If you’ve never felt the [read more]
Signs You’ve Found The One
There are so many chapters in the book of love. Sure, it’s a cliché, but the Monotones were onto something with that iconic 1958 pop song. The chapters may not be exactly as outlined in their lyrics, but it’s essentially true that you can’t really skip to the end. It’s a process. So if you [read more]
Ready, Set, Commitment?
You’ve probably heard the jokes. Commitment is a “bad word.” We are led to believe that these three syllables alone can cause an alarming spike in blood pressure or a fainting spell in certain people. Typically rather sexist in nature, these jokes portray men as commitment-phobic children who can’t settle down. Forget all that. Commitment [read more]
Betty’s Practical Guide to Moving in Together
I have moving on-the-brain this week (since I’m moving into a new house myself) so wanted to write about the practical issues around moving in with your partner. For insights about how to arrive at this important decision (or not), and an overview of some of the issues involved, you can revisit some of my [read more]
Inspired Action for Deepening Your Relationship
True love was something Desmond and Sevilla never questioned. They had it. They had felt grateful and blessed for seven years since the day they met at a bicycle auction in upstate New York. They’d married at the top of a ski mountain the following winter where their wedding party skied or snowboarded down to [read more]